This doesn’t have to be happening. Though Kylo’s physically holding him down, Ronan doesn’t have to exist physically at all. He could dissolve into stardust and be gone before Kylo would have a chance to capture his spirit, escape to safety a hundred miles away in a split second, and Kylo couldn’t follow.
So how is it a question? Why is it something Kylo even needs to ask? Ronan is battling every instinct that tells him to fight and to flee, all in favor of remaining with Kylo, who only punishes him more for his dedication.
When he tries to voice even a word of that sentiment, all that spills out of him is a sob. His legs have gone numb, or maybe it’s just that he can’t feel anything but pain anymore. He’s losing everything to it.
He can’t reach out to Kylo, not with touch or words, so he tries to do it with his mind. He takes the searing ache inside him and tries to remember what it’s like when it’s not so hateful. He thinks of their hunger for one another and their relief whenever they’re reunited. And from there, every other moment they share, the ones that have nothing to do with carnal desire and everything to do with being seen and known.
Maybe it’s always been too much to hope that Kylo could love him. Maybe there isn’t enough, in Ronan, to love, and possession was always the nearest thing to love that a creature like Ronan could experience. But, god, how he’s loved being possessed by Kylo. Even if this is what it means. He wants it more than anything.
no subject
So how is it a question? Why is it something Kylo even needs to ask? Ronan is battling every instinct that tells him to fight and to flee, all in favor of remaining with Kylo, who only punishes him more for his dedication.
When he tries to voice even a word of that sentiment, all that spills out of him is a sob. His legs have gone numb, or maybe it’s just that he can’t feel anything but pain anymore. He’s losing everything to it.
He can’t reach out to Kylo, not with touch or words, so he tries to do it with his mind. He takes the searing ache inside him and tries to remember what it’s like when it’s not so hateful. He thinks of their hunger for one another and their relief whenever they’re reunited. And from there, every other moment they share, the ones that have nothing to do with carnal desire and everything to do with being seen and known.
Maybe it’s always been too much to hope that Kylo could love him. Maybe there isn’t enough, in Ronan, to love, and possession was always the nearest thing to love that a creature like Ronan could experience. But, god, how he’s loved being possessed by Kylo. Even if this is what it means. He wants it more than anything.