[IC CONTACT]

[photophobic]

You should know where to find me.
But if you leave a message here, I will see it.

Comments

[photophobic]

We don't have a concept of Hell where I am from. Not like you do here, an existence after death where our actions are judged and evildoers are made to pay for their sins.

I don't believe in it. But I think I am in it.

[pummelgranite]

right?

[ The reply really shouldn't make her smile fondly, and yet... ]

want to come drink alone in the dark?

[photophobic]

Everclear?

Violence has always been my remedy of choice. But it offers little relief here without purpose or direction. The dead return. It changes nothing.

I considered buying a cigarette a few days ago. Perhaps I should have contacted you.

[pummelgranite]

Everclear's an option.
A whole cigarette huh? How'd that go?

[photophobic]

My grandfather came by the house before I made any solid plans.
He's concerned about me. Everyone wants me to know they are here for me. Whatever that means.

How is your friend? The... head.

[pummelgranite]

We thought they were dead.
But she took them. Burned their body.
I've been mourning them like a fucking idiot
after killing the only bitch who knew where they were hidden
like that
as a head
for months
they remember mostly screaming
So that's how Inanna's doing.
wait do you mean your literal grandfather?
HOLY SHIT IS DOOKU YOUR GRAMPA
thats ALSO fucked up

[photophobic]

[ Well.

Well.

Yes. Okay. He takes a minute to process all that. Attempts to, anyway, but-- ]

No. My grandfather is Darth Vader. Who died before I was born and is younger than I am, here.

[ Okay. Now... the rest. ]

Of course you mourned.
You couldn't have known it was possible to survive like that.
Does it bring you any relief, knowing you killed the bitch responsible?

[pummelgranite]

it DID
killing her was the only reason I climbed back out of my grave
was like i wasn't really breathing until she was dead
but what does that matter?
inanna and Lucifer will still be stuck down there whenever they port out

[ you know, hence asking him for the porter, if he just so happened to have it to give her. ]

[photophobic]

I know what it is to build yourself around that hunger. That rage of loss. I know it. I feel it too.

Do you believe in destiny? You must, I think. On some level, you must.
If you feel so strongly for them that it was only the desire to avenge them saved you from death and despair, you must know that is only the beginning of what that anger can do.
You will find them. Wherever they have been hidden. No matter what stands in your way. Even if you have to tear the universe apart to do it. You will find them.
That fire in your heart will be satisfied with nothing less.

[pummelgranite]

[ It's not a terribly long time until her next reply. Ten minutes, fifteen maybe. Less than he might expect. ]

Thank you, Kylo.

[ and another, only another minute or two later ]

No one's ever said it like that.

[ The other gods have sang it into her head, of course: the glory of power and rebellion and struggle. But that was inspiration, not diagnosis. Sure performing that was all well and good, but outside of performances, there had been the wagging fingers, the dismissal, "you'll-regret-this," "you're better than this," "don't." What good is inspiration if you don't have the courage to follow through on what you preach?

Her friends have been alternately afraid for her, and of her. None of the living had understood that it was her inexorable hatred that had delivered them from Ananke. Inanna and Luci had accepted all of her, but not even they quite truly understood the strength of hers that was made of pain.

Not like Kylo did. ]

I know, right?
I know she never would have given them up.
We can't get the truth like you can
but I fucking wish I still had her alive right now